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When a Loved One Becomes DisabledBy Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D.When my friend’s 25-year-old son suffered a head injury in a major car accident, death seemed like a certain outcome. Instead, he recovered. But medications caused him to gain 50 pounds and he suffered from cognitive delays that might, or might not, resolve.He didn’t look or act at all like the athletic young man I had watched grow up. “I was prepared for his death,” said his mother. “I wasn’t prepared for this. My job is to figure …